A New Way Of Thinking For 2019

*This post is part of my paid collaboration with Very.

Something that I have learnt over the last year is that when I make resolutions all I do is write a list of the things I should stop doing in the new year. A huge focus on all the negatives in my behaviour. Which leaves me feeling rubbish about myself before I have even began. The reality is I will have failed to keep any of the resolutions before the end of January so what purpose do they serve? Just a tool to highlight my insecurities it seems. With that in mind I just want to have a list of goals instead this year. Which I am hoping is not the same thing and I will respond better to this way of thinking. I have always had issues with being told what to do!

There is also a mindset that if you actually write down your goals, we can call them hopes and wishes too, then this will put them out into the universe. Which makes them happen. Airy fairy nonsense? Most likely, but giving it a bash cant hurt.

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With that in mind I would like to share some of my goals for the coming year.

Photography

It is my hobby and my job (and my absolute favourite thing to do). The lines have always been a little blurred and so I want to focus on photography that is for me and not for any social space that I have. I have already started doing this. With both boys at school I have been spending one day every few weeks just visiting somewhere new with my camera. Trying out new compositions and techniques and really understanding what I find appealing. None of it is photography that is suitable for instagram and that is perfect because it is just for me. It will probably live gathering dust on a memory card somewhere but that is just perfect because not everything we do needs to be validated by likes.

Spend Less Time Alone

I work for myself and the latter part of 2018 got really busy for me with various projects. I found that, apart from the odd coffee with friends, I had been alone for nearly for an entire month. It didn’t help that Si works long hours and is also studying after work meaning I literally hadn’t spoke to any adults at all. I was feeling so flat, exhausted and all of my creativity had diminished. I am aiming to plan something social at least once a week this year. Which is loads more than I normally manage. I love being alone but I struggle to be productive if I haven’t had some time with the people that I love.

Celebrate My Achievements

Just that. No playing it down or comparing my achievements to others. Just giving myself a pat on the back without feeling like an egotistical clown. I might even write my achievements down as they happen and reread them when I am suffering with anxiety. (Which can be so out of control at times that I definitely need to work on that too). When I say ‘I may write them down’ I probably won’t. Can you imagine if someone found a list of all the things I thought I was great at.

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And one final roll over goal from last year.

Spend More Time Outdoors

(Potential false stat alert) Prisoners by law are meant to have a minimum of 1 hour a day outdoors. For their wellbeing and mental health. I read that somewhere and it really stuck with me. I always feel better if I have spent time outdoors and it is always one of my goals to keep on top of it. Outdoors more and technology free more.

These are my simple goals. Nothing about weight, nothing about fitness or how much kale I consume. Just things that I know mean a lot to me and aren’t really that tough to stick to!

Wishing you all an amazing year whatever it holds for you.

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