I am waving a timid hello.
How are you all? I haven’t been blogging recently because life has been nothing short of overwhelming if I am honest. I struggle to find the balance between creating uplifting content and throwing in real life sometimes. That comes from a place where I feel there is someone always worse off and who really needs to hear my problems after all?
But then isn’t it the knowing that we all share dark times, that ultimately brings us together? That and the love for a dress with pockets of course.
I will be honest and say there a part of my life that I have never shared online. The reason being is that I don’t want it to define me. Yet sometimes when I hear that people are comparing themselves to me I want to scream it from the rooftops. Without elaborating, I had a bit of a difficult childhood and unfortunately recent events have meant I have had to relive some of the feelings from back then.
Which has been emotional, I have been stress eating and gained a lot of weight, lived on sugar and generally have just been feeling very sad.
Which is fun.
As if to save me from the gloom, it only seems right that we sold our house. Finally it looked like we could focus on a new chapter. Followed by a week later an amazing and promising house comes on the market. I could hardly believe our luck. (I may have jumped up and down while clapping my hands like a child) After months of looking and struggling to accept the quality of house difference relocating would mean this seemed like a light at the end of the tunnel for me. Then (wait for it, here comes the plot twist) before I could even share the link with Si I get a phone call that our chain had broken and we had therefore no longer sold. This hasn’t been elaborated for story telling effect. It was this exact kick in the teeth.
Everything happens for a reason, I know that, but also it is pretty shit.
Over on Instagram however you might have seen that I have had two separate days where film crews were in my house. While it is kinda nuts, it is also great to be doing more with my career. I have basically thrown myself into work to try and rise above the cloud that has been over me the last few months. I really love my job and it has been such a blessing the last few months. The first film crew were Topps Tiles who were filing a house tour for their channel. I have used Topps Tiles to renovate both bathrooms. ( Downstairs renovation post here and upstairs here) The second filming day was working with Very which I cant wait to share with you. (Once I can)
I wouldn’t have these opportunities if you weren’t reading my blog like you are now and if you weren’t being supportive on my instagram account like you do. So I wanted to say thank you. A huge cheesy thank you. Mostly because my personal life has been testing and the escapism of social media has genuinely helped. I guess I wanted to put this post out there because I had been made aware that people were feeling disheartened by instagram. That they were comparing themselves to others. So now you all know that things are far from rosy over here so don’t ever let the fact I have a new dress make you feel rubbish. (even if it does have pockets)
This isn’t a searching for sympathy post. I am ok. I have perspective and know that despite some of these sad events, this will pass. Things normally work out just fine. (and if they don’t then there is always Pinterest quote to make you feel better)